Peeps from behind the bars My leavened existence under Jasmin and rose wreaths of someone’s laughs
Mir Shah Nawaz Talpur
Today I have severely felt that here in prison, across is tied on the back of every human being. While pulling and dragging the cross of mine I have been exasperated like press bull. I feel that the pieces of that cross have been dropping on surface of my mind continuously.
I am pressing down some of them as under, the cruel rules of the time have always tried to put behind stone walls the light, knowledge, thoughts and sensibilities. They have always stopped their light from expanding to the world.
These forces and their establishers have apparently eyes but the light of history has made them blind that they even cannot see under their nose. Instead of its supports of truth and beauty always say, you can imprison me, you can suck my blood like leeches, you can make pieces my body, even you can hand me but no penitentiary has yet been designed to prevent the humans from thinking.
The body of man can be imprisoned but not his thoughts and ideas – minds cannot be chained the spirit cannot be incarcerated.
Have you every witnessed the panoramic view of reflecting thoughts of man through wet banks of eye lashes? Have you ever felt the pain of bleeding and injured feelings of someone? Have you ever paid attention to the voice of the heart eagering for an interview with the beloved? Have you sighted the moon when its moonlight is poured on the cell of prison?
Have you asked that moonlight that when she insights the cell of an inmate how the tempest arise in his/her heart. Tides of thoughts arise, waves of tides parts the inside of an inmate into pieces and a strange fire starts burning inside and gradually that fire vapors out through eyes in shape of lot tears, have you ever felt the pain in those tears?
Those tears contain the entire pain of the universe. Have you ever felt the severeness of those pains?
Some punishments have the human meet deprivations, prison is one of them.
The confinement is a very strange thing!!!
Here the life stops going ahead. The life converts into hope and regression. Thus, under the phenomena of regression and hope, a prisoner meets complete despondency.
He makes new relations with thousands of thoughts. Every morning begins with worries and twilight ends with despondencies and disappointments, and the light runs under lots of worries and hurries some have heaven and some have hell.
The life has strange mysteries. The might is gradually, grooming young, chill winds have given smile on the face of the night. But a prisoner who is Mir by name but he is miserable. He is cursing the night, its smile and youth.
The life is very beautiful but I am deprived of all its happiness confined in the dark cell of a prison. When I see through the bars I witness the might has worn black costume. The high walls of prison, the higher outer walls of prison, the higher outer wall, the locks and chains not only limit the life but being inside it the sky seems little.
Often my nights are spent with the sky and the stars.
The night of separation and that is empty of the sky and stars. Oh! How strongly I long for a night with sky full of twinkling stars. The black eye bags under my eyes are evidence of inside of pains.
Pains have many aspects and patterns. A pain is the pain of body and its scars remain on the body but another pain is that destroys the feelings and spirit. It creates quakes in the mind. In that, troubling pain the spirits shades the tears of blood and the heart forgets how to smile?
The city in which I live, here are the nests of horrific birds. After sunset the city goes dark like the hut of poor man. The time is getting along but witch of the city has squashed my knees and make me disable. The life is creeping on earth like worms and insets.
The sky is silent, the earth is till but he human inside me is committing suicide. So I am among the barbarian mob for storming to kill for the crime of prohibited love of Mir Murtaza Bhutto shaheed, Sindh and Sindhi people.
These cruel rulers have stones in their hands. They have sentenced me for sixty six years. I have so far served thirteen years on one hundred and fifty six months or four thousand six hundred and forty five days in the prison.
I have seen many of my dreams putting out behind these cruel walls. I have to strangulate my desires. I have seen the funerals of my many hopes and wishes. I have died many deaths. Each time the death was more painful. The loneliness is the first death of a man.
These prisons have swallowed half of my life. It has snatched all my beloved relations. The life has left me thirsty in the bundles desert and pushed me to wonder after mercy.
Had the loving ones fulfilled their promises there would have been no late in our reuniting.
The might is uncovering the black sheet from here face and the light of the days is opening the knots of the philosophy of beauty. The prayer calls are echoing. On the sky of the prison the might is performing the farewell dance like gipsy girls.
The winter is at is peak. The weather is charming like the smile of an innocent child. The cold of Karachi is not like free plains yet the view outside is cheering. My mind recalls the life of Shaikh Ayaz poet of Sindh:
Come on! See thru the ventilator of prison,
How lovely the night is,
I peep from behind the bars of my room; greenery of the park seems very lovely.